Just wanted to say hello

I actually have quite a few projects to share. Unfortunately, we've had either rain or just plain dark and dreary weather for over a week. Until today. But, now that the weather is bright enough that I can actually see in my apartment and maybe take some pictures, what did I do? Well, took off to the park with Mia, of course. We met some other members of a parenting/kids group we've been part of since Mia was four months old (Mindful Parenting given by Johanna Herwitz for those of you in NYC that are interested). Even though we meet as a class every Monday, this was the first time we got together outside of class. It's so funny. I've known these women as mothers for almost two years, yet this is the first time we've met out of class and shared with each other things about ourselves outside of parenthood. You know, where we live. Where we're from. How long we've lived in New York. What we love about it. What we don't love about it. What we do outside of parenting. I found out today that one woman is a professional photographer. One is an interior designer and sews. She even came to the park with a seam ripper in her pocket. I couldn't believe it. How could I know this person for so long and not know she sews too? I guess thinking about this, it's actually very typical about the way things work here. Of course there are always exceptions, but getting to know people is actually very difficult. At least for me. And if you do meet people and get to know them well, they eventually leave the city. So many people come here for a few years to experience the place and then realize it's a tough place to live or they miss home or want more space or more peace or grass. And off they go to wherever that may be. Long Island. Westchester. California. Or some leave for career opportunities. Sweden. Hong Kong. London. And sometimes, you can have one of the most wonderful, interesting people you've ever known live just 10 blocks away, but never see them because people here work long, hard hours including weekends. Anyway, I'm not really sure how I got onto this subject, so I'll get to what I really meant to write about... I saw Autum's borrowed meme and thought I'd borrow it too:

I AM: a wife. a mother. a daughter. a friend. trying to find my new place in the world since Mia was born. the happiest I've ever been thanks to motherhood, an amazing husband and my own determination to live a happy life.

I WANT: to love. to give. to create. to laugh. to connect.

I HATE: when things are out of my control. when I can't fix things for other people. when I feel as if I can't fix things for myself. months and months of bitter cold weather.

I MISS: my family. my friends out of NYC. walks at the end of the day, when everything is that beautfiul blue just before darkness (I don't do that much now since Mia sleeps at 7:00). the garden I had in Austin. the garden I had in Tampa. the traveling I did with Tarek when we lived in London. having enough space. having enough light.

I FEAR: losing those I love. making mistakes.

I HEAR: the hum of the computer and Mia's room monitor. and surprisingly, nothing else.

I WONDER: how my life would have been had I joined the Peace Corps after college.

I REGRET: not maintaining my Spanish speaking ability. I was basically fluent after college (minored in Spanish). The old saying, "if you don't use it, you lose it" is so true.

I AM NOT: as bold as I'd like to be.

I DANCE: every chance I get. with Mia often.

I SING: every day to Mia.

I CRY: not as much as I used to.

I AM NOT ALWAYS: energetic. I feel tired much of the time.

I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: as much as I can.

I WRITE: only on this blog and in emails. funny, because I have a journalism degree.

I CONFUSE: myself often.

I NEED: hugs from Mia and Tarek. a creative outlet. sunlight.

I SHOULD: takes pictures of my projects for this blog.

I START: projects, but don't finish them.

I FINISH: the projects I'm happy with.